I Find You're Gone
May. 13th, 2008 06:13 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
trickykittyI was hoping that with the passing of my senior thesis and graduation that my stress level would go down.
It's gone up, and my normal means of stress relief is sort of taking a temporary leave of absence as it were. Curling up in a ball just feels too much like a cop out. Playing video games just feels like I'm in avoidance. My newly spawned stress headache has my stomach in knots. I don't know if I can eat without throwing up. So I'm venting here.
There are a few friends who are dealing with issues in their own lives and I wish I could make everything better for them. It bugs me when I have no choice than to sit back, wait, and be a passive voyeur.
My sister has officially been locked out of my parents' house and they are now in a holding pattern until they can get the car back from her. She's been AWOL since Friday afternoon, although I would still say it's been since before then as she only stopped by the house long enough to use the restroom that day. The boys are in my parents' custody, although, since my sister hasn't given up full custodial rights, she still retains the right to take them provided that she appears sane, lucid and not high on something.
My grandmother was in a car wreck today, which most likely totaled the car. She was the person picking up my oldest nephew from school when my sister wasn't around, so now my parents and I are figuring out our work schedules for that. I had to leave work early today to keep my mother sane while she worked on getting the car towed, calling the insurance company, and getting my grandmother picked up from the hospital. She's badly bruised but otherwise fine. The doctors want someone to be around her for the next 24 hours so my mom is having her stay at their house.
My dad's dad keeps calling the house and my dad keeps avoiding him. That grandparent pair is in an Alzheimer's facility they are not allowed to leave without a chaperon. I haven't seen them since they went in there almost a year and a half ago. I don't know if my grandmother will understand if/when we manage to get my graduation announcement to them exactly what it means. i just hope she still recognizes me.
I still have ten million things on my to-do list and my room is a complete disaster area. I did manage to put away all of my clean clothes finally, after about 4 months of them sitting in a basket on the floor after every washing.
Is it strange that I'm highly stressed about NOT having some sort of school related project to be working on?
It's gone up, and my normal means of stress relief is sort of taking a temporary leave of absence as it were. Curling up in a ball just feels too much like a cop out. Playing video games just feels like I'm in avoidance. My newly spawned stress headache has my stomach in knots. I don't know if I can eat without throwing up. So I'm venting here.
There are a few friends who are dealing with issues in their own lives and I wish I could make everything better for them. It bugs me when I have no choice than to sit back, wait, and be a passive voyeur.
My sister has officially been locked out of my parents' house and they are now in a holding pattern until they can get the car back from her. She's been AWOL since Friday afternoon, although I would still say it's been since before then as she only stopped by the house long enough to use the restroom that day. The boys are in my parents' custody, although, since my sister hasn't given up full custodial rights, she still retains the right to take them provided that she appears sane, lucid and not high on something.
My grandmother was in a car wreck today, which most likely totaled the car. She was the person picking up my oldest nephew from school when my sister wasn't around, so now my parents and I are figuring out our work schedules for that. I had to leave work early today to keep my mother sane while she worked on getting the car towed, calling the insurance company, and getting my grandmother picked up from the hospital. She's badly bruised but otherwise fine. The doctors want someone to be around her for the next 24 hours so my mom is having her stay at their house.
My dad's dad keeps calling the house and my dad keeps avoiding him. That grandparent pair is in an Alzheimer's facility they are not allowed to leave without a chaperon. I haven't seen them since they went in there almost a year and a half ago. I don't know if my grandmother will understand if/when we manage to get my graduation announcement to them exactly what it means. i just hope she still recognizes me.
I still have ten million things on my to-do list and my room is a complete disaster area. I did manage to put away all of my clean clothes finally, after about 4 months of them sitting in a basket on the floor after every washing.
Is it strange that I'm highly stressed about NOT having some sort of school related project to be working on?
