Atheist?

[trickykitty]

I saw this on PostSecret today, and the first thought through my head was, "Then you're not an atheist."

The second thought through my mind was, "Whenever you say, 'Blah, Blah, Blah, BUT...' then you completely negate anything that came before the 'BUT'." We've had this conversation before.

The two thoughts complement each other.

Comments

[damia]

I don't believe in god. I believe the concept is a psychological crutch.
There are still moments when I'd pray to god but it's not an acknowledgement that he exists. It's an acknowledgment that things are fucked beyond my fixing. It's a frenzied hope of desperation that if something, anything beyond me can unfuck it that I'm game.

The great thing about being an Atheist is that God becomes an idea, nothing more. Ideas are easy to use when needed and discard when not.

[trickykitty]

I think that's why at some point I gave up on the terms atheist and agnostic as a whole, and I try to refer to myself as simply secular. I got tired of carrying around an idea that I didn't believe in as a crutch. Habit sometimes still brings out the words and ideas that I used to fall back on, but I don't like that they were ever there to fall back on in the first place.

I hope that makes sense.

[damia]

There was a time when using the exclamation "Oh god" and the like really bugged me. It seemed a stark representation of how prevalent the idea had ingrained itself in the mass population. But after a while it lost even that meaning.

I use other phrases that are just as pointless to me; "Let the cat out of the bag," etc. Using a common colloquialism does not show affiliation to the phrase or what it was based on.

As far as using the term Atheist to describe myself - I used to avoid it. I argued that it was like describing myself as "Not Blonde." While it may be true there are far more accurate terms that describe what I am.

I'd been rolling around my rational around in my head for some time when about two years ago I encountered one of those woe stories at a gas station. Guy needed gas, blah blah blah, I handed him a twenty and he spouted off a "God bless you for being a good Christian" kind of thank you.

That got me thinking it's not about me. It's not about what label I feel best represents me. To everyone else I am an Athiest. It's important to speak up about that and show people that we are perfectly normal people.
I've come to feel the same way about being bi and poly. I'm working on being more out spoken about my beliefs. Unfortunately poly is still one that I feel I need to remain tight lipped.

My boss is a (Jewish) Atheist married gay man. He's very outspoken about his life choices, has his own podcast. etc. Drove the point home when he was talking about alternative lifestyles needing to 'come out of the closet' then he paused and pointed out that he could understand why I chose to stay closed lipped (in the office) about being poly.

[trickykitty]

"That got me thinking it's not about me."

Good point. There are times to bring attention to the words being used, but there are other times when it's the reason for the words that are important.

I've learned from reading a book on communication recently that my default is to focus on the semantics and rhetoric rather than the human, emotional part of the conversation. That side of the equation is difficult for me to follow and be a part of, so it's easier to ignore it. Unfortunately, in the past it meant someone making a kind gesture by saying thank you using their religious terminology would have stirred up all kinds of negativity from me, because yeah, I would have turned it around and made it about me and how I am not religious, and therefore the other person shouldn't be using such terms with me. That's not communication - that's a lecture - and I've been noticing how much I'm prone to that after reading about my communication style in that book.

Practicing paying attention to the emotional side of communication is so very difficult for me. I'm trying to find a new balance between my default communication and being able to be more ... uh, the opposite, really. Yeah, it's a work in progress.

Being yourself has implications beyond just communicating. It's not just poly that gets tamped down. Anytime you'd prefer to kick your shoes off versus dressing up in a monkey suit to go to work, that's normal, but society says we have to conform for certain situations if we wish to not get put into a loony bin or jail. It's amazing how much being told to be yourself is actually about being told to follow the rules so that you fit in with your chosen group, whether it be friends, work, neighbors, etc.

[damia]

Found the quote that kept rattling around in my head. It's not that the reason for the words are important - it's that using words that everyone understands is important.

"It's up to the artist to use language that can be understood, not hide it in some private code. Most of these jokers don't even want to use language you and I know or can learn . . . they would rather sneer at us and be smug, because we 'fail' to see what they are driving at. If indeed they are driving at anything--obscurity is usually the refuge of incompetence.”
― Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

Being able to speak in an easily understood tongue and still get your point across is an art.
I still wouldn't say "Atheist" is the best description of me - but it is an easily understood one. Marketing has taught me that you have to get as much information as possible to an audience that is easily distracted.
Yes, spouting off about the exact nature and diameter of your spiritual self would be more informative. But chances are most people will become disinterested before you get to the point.
That's what I meant by 'it's not about me.'

Good quote

[trickykitty]

LOL - I think we're saying the same thing, but in different ways, which is kind of ironic given the subject matter.

What I've learned from that book on communication styles is that it boils down to being more attuned to the communication styles of others so that I can tailor my speech to fit their style more than my own. They're more likely to understand "correctly" the message being conveyed if I am able to pay attention and meet their communication needs which may be different from mine.

Re: Good quote

[damia]

Ah, yes indeed.
I've recently been realizing that having a full time job that requires me to create stuffs that illicit a specific response, means I've become more attuned to what's motivating people when they talk more than what words are coming out of their mouths.

[flemco]

I cannot give one inch of mercy to idiots who say shit like this.

Let's try it some other ways:

I SWEAR I'M A VEGETARIAN... BUT WHEN I GET HUNGRY I STILL EAT STEAK.

I SWEAR I'M CELIBATE... BUT WHEN I GET HORNY I FUCK PEOPLE.

I SWEAR I'M DRUG FREE... BUT WHEN I GET STRESSED I STILL SLAM SOME HEROIN.

I SWEAR I'M A FEMINIST... BUT WHEN A WOMAN ANNOYS ME, I THINK OF HER AS A SUBHUMAN CUNT DUE TO HER GENDER.

I SWEAR I'M A PERSON WHO DOESN'T SMEAR FECES ON KIDS AT THE PLAYGROUND... EXCEPT WHEN I GO TO THE PLAYGROUND AND SMEAR FECES ON CHILDREN.

Nope, doesn't work.