It's all relative

[trickykitty]

I'm not normal, but I also don't fit any non-normal descriptions when it comes to my type of social interactions. I spent many years dealing with PTSD which required me to relearn emotions and get used to the concept of hugs from friends. I have OCD (OCPD?), but do not require medications to be functional. I am capable of being social, but have random comments that would otherwise have me shivved without a clue as to why. My physical interactions with people are bonkers and either I come off too strong or come off too cold.

There are times when I wish I could be one way or the other. Either completely normal and capable and aware, or completely a-social as to be labeled with something so that everyone has an auto-excuse with which to write me off. It's like being able to say, "Oh, well that outburst was because of tourettes".

I think that would be nice. I wouldn't mind being written off with a label. At least then I could be explained.

EDIT: I remember my best friend describing me to her paranoid drug supplier at the time. "Oh, that's just Nicole. She's harmless." It was a running joke for us for quite some time. I honestly think it was the best description of myself I had ever heard. However, sometimes I wonder.

Comments

[jdack]

I know the feeling. I find myself stuck in some kind of middle ground, where I'm not crazy enough to be some mad genius but I'm not sane enough to be "normal."